Archive for November, 2005

Great Guns and Little Pistols! I have decided.

Wednesday, November 30th, 2005

Last night I decided on the default gravatar. It will be Don, Fuzzy, Dale, a prairie dog sporting a white hat, a peacemaker side arm and a few other items. It will change infrequently and without warning. Although this is not what I originally planned, it is more fun for me.

On a more serious note, a new Ozzie post is in the works.

Still not Settled

Tuesday, November 29th, 2005


Well my wife can be very persuasive. She thinks that representing some of you ladies with one of these ugly dudes is a bad idea.

So then what? She likes Ronaldus Magnus but he isn’t really a sidekick. Gabby aint any better than fuzzy. Tonto is named Tonto (an insult where I grew up). So then are there any straight shooting, white hat wearing sidekicks I could use? You bet.


I could use the ultimate sidekick. She was a white hat wearing, straight shooting bombshell that stuck with her fella after the movies were over. The mighty DALE!

The big question is, “which picture should I use?” Clearly this one is doesn’t fit the motif here. There are a million great pictures of her. It is really hard to decide.

My favorite is this one. She even holds her .32 like a lady. But this won’t look right when it shrunk down to size.

Maybe I should go with the one of these.

Default Gravatar

Monday, November 28th, 2005

I have wanted a default gravatar for a while. I put up a stunning picture of the comedic genius Don Knotts. Jeff thinks this is a bad idea. I want the epitome of a straight shooter. I have narrowed it down to two characters that are worthy of our respect. Give me a little input here.

Should it be Don or Fuzzy?

Finding Good Help

Saturday, November 26th, 2005

One of my co-workers was in a 7-11 the other day. Standing at the counter was a young man seeking employment. Dallas has a low unemployment rate so convenience stores will take some rough characters.

The young man was wearing a knit cap. He also sported a nose ring. Not the bling bling type. He was wearing a full size hog ring between his nostrils. He said he was looking for a job that was close to his house so he could, “walk or unicycle to work.”

The man behind the counter gave him an application. Then the young man walked away into the night.

This begs the question: Was he really a unicyclist or a unicyclist impersonator? I don’t know which is worse.

This is why we can’t take ourselves too seriously. My grand father always says, “If you can’t laugh at yourself, then you can’t laugh at all these other clowns.” And who doesn’t laugh at clowns on unicycles?

The Good, The Better & The Ugly

Wednesday, November 23rd, 2005

Not all turkeys are this pretty. Some look better than others. Some taste better than others. A few thanksgivings back, Echotig cooked an ugly turkey. It was pale. It looked undercooked. To add insult to injury it had a large piece of torn skin across the breast, where the cooking bag stuck to it.

Echo is a good cook. She takes pride in the turkeys she cooks for thanksgiving. She took this way too hard. My cousin popped off and said it was ugly. He pops of a lot so nobody really paid attention, except Echo. She was hurt. Nobody wanted to eat her turkey.

There were many at this gathering. And there were four turkeys. It was a beautiful sight. My cousin Mike led us in prayer, then we lined up at the tables to fix our plates. My father took his place cutting the ugly turkey. I of course was going to eat nothing else. We were determined to make Echo feel better. Only three partook of this bird: Dad, Echo and Me. Nobody else wanted the ugly turkey.

Only three ate of the bird. Only three finished the whole thing. You see we have not been able to replicate this. This was one of those rare amazing accidents. This was indeed the best turkey I have ever tasted. On my first bite, I started to extol the natural wonder that was the ugly turkey. My father put his hand over my mouth and gave me the shut up look. The three of us ate with a feeling of mischief. Echo even told someone that it was no good. Normally I save a lot of room for desert. Not this year.

For many reasons, that will always be my favorite thanksgiving. And I will never neglect to sample the ugly turkeys.

Oh Yes! I’m the Great Pretender. Ozzie part 1

Tuesday, November 22nd, 2005

This proved to be too much for one post. So I will write a few.

We all have some people we look up to. I wanted to post about the one at the top of my list. You see there are some folks that a man looks up to and there are some folks that go beyond that. This is one man that I try hard to copy. It is wonderful when people recognize the characteristics in you that you strive for. It is good when you seem to be like the people you put on a pedestal. I have been called many things. Some of them good. Some of them bad. I have been called a straight shooter. I have been called colorful. Some of you have even called me “the genuine article.” I must admit that any truth, any color or substance in me comes directly from the man I try to mimic. Even wearing the big white hat comes from him. This man is the genuine article. I am only a pretender.

This is Ozzie, my Grandfather. The baby is my mother. I know to the pride he is feeling here. These pictures mean much more when you have shared the experience. No Jimbo, the ’29 Ford is no longer around. I’m sure he was elated. Having a new baby in the house is a special kind of paradise for man. I’m glad he experienced this before going to the Pacific to fight a war.

Ozzie is a fantastic character. His way with words, his good judgment, his wisdom, and his mettle are exactly what I strive for. Some folks have goals for what they want to achieve. I have goals for who I want to be. My goal is to be like him. If only I could be half of what this man is, then I will be more of man than most.

This is the first of at least three posts on my Grandfather. Each of these will feature specific roles he has played in my life. These posts may or may not be sequential. My cousin (1st once removed) Rich, has posted about him here. We can attest that he has been a fantastic man for both of our generations.

The Four Seasons

Tuesday, November 15th, 2005

An old Texism states Texas has four seasons: Almost Summer, Summer, Still Summer and Christmas. Today marks the end of Still Summer. Tis the season.

The other day I put away the straw hat and donned the felt hat. Almost nothing feels as good as a felt hat. Today, I partook of another rite of passage. The picture shows my felt hat atop the stub that was a banana tree. A frost is likely tonight. Bananas trees don’t like frost much. Preparing them for cool weather is a rite of passage for me.

In the past I have just cut the whole tree down about ankle high. Then when Almost Summer rolls around I cut the rotten end off and the Tree starts growing again. One of my compadres cut off the leaves and wrapped his last year. This year he had 8’ trees by mid March. So now the broad leaves are cut. I used the leaves and feed sacks to wrap the trunks. I hope I get the same results my friend did.

The weather changes as time marches on. The clock ticks down on the game. I am far from the fourth quarter. But also far from a comfortable lead. I have to keep my head in the game. I must defend well and run up the score. Folks are relying on me. I don’t want to disappoint them. It aint bad though. I love this game.

Post Script: That good post I promised is still on the way. It is about someone special. He is alive and kicking so I want to get it just right. I need to digitize some pictures and shorten it a little. Adios.